Extreme Examples of a Bad CV

I recently came across an e-mail citing examples of a bad CV.

'Just IT' ran a six-week study to help students and graduates improve their CVs.
Managing director Sunil Duggal receives hundreds of CVs and cover letters every day, some brilliant and others appalling. In a bid to educate job seekers about what to avoid writing, he has identified the worst to land on his desk.

Each is labeled as a type, and all are best avoided.

The neurotic: a candidate submitted a password protected CV which could not be accessed.

The evangelist: a candidate ended a covering letter with ‘Jesus loves you’.

The banker: a candidate put their bank details on their CV.

The cyber-criminal: a candidate put that their life’s ambition was to be a hacker.

The punctual one: a candidate put ‘I’m good at timekeeping. I wake up at 6am on Monday, Wednesday and Friday’ on their cover letter.

The bone idle: a candidate sent across a generic template leaving gaps where there should have been information describing the job position they were applying for, and the company they were applying to.

The enigma: a CV was submitted with no name or contact details.

The pervert: CVs with inappropriate email addresses such as ‘caught****ing@school.com’.

The narcissist: a cover letter from a candidate with one objective - ‘to please and attain supreme perfection’.

The porn star: a CV was submitted including a photo more suitable for a glamour shoot.

This made me laugh. Luckily I don't think my CV is that bad although judging by my bad luck in the job market maybe it is. However next week on Thursday I have a job interview in Telford for 'Jacobs' (transportation dept) and on November 6th in Luton for a market research company called 'Critical'. Hopefully something comes of one of these, ideally the Telford role because I would like to use some skills developed through my Geography degree in a work related 'sphere'.

Listening to: Superchunk - Here's Where The Strings Come In